Signs BastianMerc

Learn from my experience

Learn from my experiences.
Sometimes it takes a lot of courage to face life and try to survive. You can read my published book "RUTH MINERVA" or reading my blogs. You will have more information.

I was born in San Lorenzo, Puerto Rico, on January 27, 1942. I had a pretty good life until my grandma Filo, whom I called "Wella" took me to NYC, January 1947. The plane landed at La Guardia airport. I remember that day. We went to live at my Uncle Tony and Aunt Jenny's apartment in Manhattan, on a 5th-floor walk-up. I was happy.
Months later, my mother Carmen arrived at NYC withmy three brothers. She lived in a rented room around the corner from my uncle Tony and God-mother Jenny's home. Weeks later my father Artemio arrived from Puerto Rico and went to live with my mother. My father had only one leg, his other leg was amputated, when he had a truck accident.  Wella Filo had to return to Puerto Rico because Grandpa Jesus needed her. Wella could not take me with her, because my parents applied for welfare and had me on the budget. My heart was broken, I wanted to go with Wella Filo. I had lived all my life with Wella Filo, she was devastated but the law was on my parent's side.
 Papi, my father had rented an extra room for me. I hated living with my parents. Months later we moved to an apartment where my hell began. I was molested by my father. Although he apologized I could not trust him.
I went to school, where I had many adventures. I had no sisters, and the girls did not like me, so I became a tomboy. I played with my brothers. I grew up with 9 boys who didn't allow any other boys near me. Norman, my oldest brother taught me how to fight, swim, and many other boy games.
Papi took every opportunity and excuse to sleep with me. I was unable to sleep when he slept on my bed. I felt his penis rub my back and I had to move away from him. I was afraid to tell my mom, because she would not believe me. If I told Norman, my oldest brother, he would have killed him.  When Norman got married I stood in his house every moment that I could.
Finally, I got married and thought I was free. Actually, my second hell started. My first husband mentally tortured me. We moved from place to place until he died in 1984. A lot happened which I wrote in my book.
I moved to Florida, with my second husband Marco. Marco is a recovering addict, bi-polar, he has compulsive behavior, chronic arthritis, needs knee replacement, He is in pain all the time, and became an alcoholic. Marco is a wonderful man, he tries.
I am now a mother of three biological daughters and two biological sons. I have 14 biological grandchildren and two biological great-grandchildren.
Life hasn't been easy but I have survived. My life journey has been arduous, funny, adventurous, mysterious, and unpredictable. 
After my experience with my first book, my life changed again. I will be writing the 2nd version of RUTH MINERVA.
My daughters stopped talking to me for almost 3 years. They did not like what I wrote. I had promised myself to write my autobiography opening the closets for the goody-two-shoes who made my life miserable and hurt me. I wanted my daughters to understand why I became who I was and the hurt thhat they had caused me. Instead they turned against me. One day they decided to talk to me. They asked why I wrote the book and I replied. They are to this day talking to me, butI feel that my oldest Ileana and  Lorena, my middle daughter, still resent me. My oldest son still feels that I was the nagger, but he calls and comes to see me. In their eyes, I am the bad one. I stopped making excuses, I don't need excuses for what happened to me.
Today I have achieved everything that I have wanted thanks to God, Goddess, and guardians. I have done all for myself for no one has helped me.
My husband still drinks alcohol but does not bother me. If he wants to kill himself, so be it!
Trying to heal a drug or alcohol abuser is like having a dog not eat bones. My husband takes drugs and medicine from VA Doctors, he also stopped smoking. He still needs his meds and sometimes I forget that he has compulsive behavior. My children have grown up
up and changed with me for the better. They are wonderful parents and grandparents I guess growing up has made them realize the truth. I too have changed, I understand them better. All of my children are good, they are not perfect,  but our love is strong. and they help me in any way the they can.  I'm still looking for a publisher to republish my three books.  I have the rights to them so I can do what I want with them. I am also reorganizing my web page. So many things have happened in my life, I will be writing different subjects, feel free to making suggestions.
This Pandemic has changed everyone's life, have faith all will be good.
and  it continues.....

Hello, my apologies

 My apologies for not responding. I did not realize that I had followers and comments. I have been unable to do any writing due to personal health. I will try to be writing often and replying to posts. Thank you for your support. I am also looking for a new publisher. American Star, also known as Publish America filed for bankruptcy. I have the rights to my books and need to re-publish them. If anyone knows of a good publisher please let me know. I cannot afford self-publishing. Again, thank you for your support. Blessings

Xantara and the Weeping Willow Tree- Chapter-6-Xantara is acknowledged

Xantara and the Weeping Willow Tree

By Ruth M Garcia-Marmolejos

Chapter 6

Xantara is acknowledged
Shamuel had kept Xantara’s wheeled box, and later, out of curiosity, decided to look through it to find out if she had any relatives. When he looked inside the box, the first thing he found was a picture of him and his sisters and brothers. That’s when he realized that the old woman was his Mother. Abelia, the oldest daughter, and Jediah the oldest son decided to investigate and found out that it was their Mother who had bought and fixed the house, Sinbad then confessed that it was Xantara who helped him to become a success and he took her house away from her. Sinbad told the truth of the
treachery he and the woman did, and how he never sent money for their education. Xantara’s children felt guilty for abandoning their mother when she most needed them. Everyone who thought that it was Sinbad and others who did all the good things felt very bad for not acknowledging Xantara’s hard work.
The willow tree, that Xantara had planted and nurtured, sprouted and grew, every time it started to bend, Xantara straightened it out, which is what she did with her kids, everything she touched and did for others.
Xantara died, sacrificing her sanity, career, life, and freedom.
Xantara’s children, Abelia, Jediah, Etta, Sarit, Uziel, and Shamuel went to Xantara’s grave. “I am so sorry, dear Mother.” Abelia said. “We were so inconsiderate and took you for granted. How can we have forgotten the sacrifices you made for us?"
“It was you who gave us our education.” Jediah said.
“It is because of you that we are all a success.” Etta said.
“We were lied to, I was younger and you told us the house had bugs.” Sarit said.
“You never told us what had really happened.” Uziel said. “You were thrown out of your house. Father betrayed you. The house was truly yours. Father paid lawyers to get you out of the house, the woman was his mistress.”
“How I must have hurt you when I said all those things before you walked out and got killed by the truck.” Shamuel said. “Now the truth is known, but it is too late, for you are gone.”
A bright light appeared and Xantara’s spirit was standing near the willow tree. ”It is never too late.” Xantara said. “I did not care about the sacrifices I made, the love for my children was worth all sacrifices. Everything I did, and everyone I helped I did with pleasure. I accepted all as part of life. Go live your life and teach your kids to be good. I just got my reward. You and everyone have acknowledged my deeds. I have my children’s love, Now my weeping willow and I will weep no more. I love you and God bless you all.”
Xantara’s spirit disappeared and beautiful white and pink flowers began to bloom
from the weeping willow tree. Xantara and the weeping willow tree, will weep no more.
Time went by and Etta had a little girl she named Xantara who looked just like her grandmother. Xantara loved to go to her grandmother’s grave and watered the weeping willow. Xantara was very attracted to the tree. “I feel as though I have been here before.” Xantara said. I wonder if it would be disrespectful to take this tree and transplanted in my house.”
“You can.” A man’s voice was heard. “But I do not think the tree will survive or be happy.”
Xantara turned around and there was a very handsome young man standing in front of her. “Who are you?” Xantara asked. “I did not ask you for your opinion.”
“My apologies Mam!” The young man replied. “My name is Mathew; I did not mean to interrupt. I just wanted to give my opinion is all. I will be going on my way.”
“Wait! Don’t go!” Xantara said. “I’m sorry I did not mean to be rude. My name is Xantara. My grandmother planted this tree here; she is buried next to it. It’s just that for some reason, I’m very attracted to it.”
Xantara and the young man continued to talk and became good friends.
Sometimes children forget the truth about their parents, either because they were too young to remember, or they were told a different story and they would rather believe the stories they were told than to remember the truth. In the end, the truth always comes out.

                                                         
                                                                


                                                                                     The End
 

Xantara and the Weeping Willow Tree-Chapter 5, Encounter with her son

Xantara and the Weeping Willow Tree

By Ruth M Garcia-Marmolejos

 

Chapter 5
Encounter with her son
One day, Xantara was walking along the sidewalk, when two children ran and knocked her down. “OH! I am sorry lady.” A young man said. “These kids are so reckless. Here let me help you up.”

The young man helped Xantara up, and when she looked it was her youngest son Shamuel. He did not recognize her. Xantara was surprised and overwhelmed, but did not say anything, took her wheeled box and left. Xantara did not want her son to see her the way she looks.

“Strange I feel like I know that woman.” Shamuel said. “I felt like something hit my chest.” The young man took the children’s hand and continued his journey.

Xantara was overwhelmed to see her son, and grandchildren she has never met. The next day, Xantara decided to walk past her old house to see how things were. She knew no one would recognize her. Walking near the house, she saw Sinbad, who had aged quickly, walking slowly toward his car.

“Hello lady, who are you?” A little boy said, “Are you lost?”

Xantara turned around and it was one of the children that made her fall on the street. “Hello young man.” Xantara replied. “No, I am just looking at that house. It reminds me of the one that I had. Do you live here?”

“Oh no!” The little boy replied. “This is my grandpa’s house. We are just visiting.”

Shamuel walked outside and when he saw Xantara with his son, he said. “Is he bothering you ma’m? Aren’t you the lady we met, the one my children knocked to the ground?”

Xantara looked down not wanting her son to recognize her and said. “Yes, I was wondering who lives here. I used to live around here at one time.”

“My father lives here.” Shamuel said.” He told us my mother left him and he met another lady who helped him out. We lived with my mother until we grew up, and when we went back to see her, she had left the apartment without telling anyone. Father helped my mother, and one day she just left taking us with her. We don’t remember much of what happened. Mother said we had to leave the house because it was infested with bugs.

Father also told us that he sent mother money for our education, and thanks to him we were able to get a good education and have a good life. I guess she did not love us enough when she disappeared.”

Xantara had to hold in her tears, her children forgot that it was her who took them to school, and their father was never round. They forgot that she had to clean houses and do odd jobs to support them, because she was suspended at her job for taking them with her. They all left her after they finished school and never returned. Xantara walked away not saying a word.”

“Wait lady!” Shamuel said. “Who are you? Do you need any help?”

“I am a nobody that you or anyone is concerned with.” Xantara said. “Good bye.” Xantara hurried off, before her son saw her tears, crossing the street without looking, all of a sudden a speeding truck was approaching and struck her. Xantara flew in the air and her body slammed against the floor. Shamuel called an ambulance and Xantara was taken to the hospital where she was pronounced dead on arrival. Xantara’s body was buried under the big willow tree that she had planted. Every day it was said that a weeping voice was heard at the same hour Xantara died.

Stay tuned for Chapter 6. The end is not always a happy one.

Xantara and the weeping Willow Tree-Chapters 3 and 4

Xantara and the Weeping Willow Tree

By Ruth M Garcia-Marmolejos

Chapters 3 and 4

Chapter 3
It continues

Xantara got older and sick, she could no longer work, she was back on the street, she was thrown out of the apartment, because a rich company had bought it and the building was demolished to make room for an office building.

Xantara found a wooden box with wheels and she uses it to put her belongings, she carries a picture of her children and wonders where they are.

Sinbad was very happy with the woman who had been his mistress for a long time. Sinbad and the woman had plotted to get Xantara out of the house. Sinbad had paid a lawyer to fake the papers; the woman was not the owner’s daughter. Everyone raved about how beautiful the house was, the beautiful job that Sinbad had done with it, and how intelligent and successful he was. There was no acknowledgement that it was Xantara who did it all, sending Sinbad to school and turning him into a successful man.

Xantara’s children were all successful, and they led a successful life, forgetting that it was their mother who helped them.
　


Chapter 4
The Weeping Willow tree
Xantara walked around the streets and sat on a rock near the yard of an old building, looking at the floor she found a young weeping willow tree. “Poor weeping willow baby.” Xantara said. “You have been abandoned just like me. I will take you out of there and plant you somewhere else where you can be seen.” Xantara continued to walk, carrying the small weeping willow tree. Xantara went inside the cemetery, and walked to the top of the hill. “ I will plant you here my Weeping Willow.” Xantara said. “For some day, I too will be buried here. I only hope to be buried under you so we can weep together. When our weeping stops, you will have beautiful blooming flowers that no one has ever seen before. That will mean that we have finally stopped weeping and will forever be happy .” Xantara planted the weeping willow , watered it and walked out of the cemetery.

What will happen next? Stay tuned for the next chapter.

Xantara and the Weeping Willow tree-Chapter 2

Xantara and the Weeping Willow Tree

By Ruth M Garcia-Marmolejos

　

Chapter 2
Xantara meets Sinbad

Xantara was in the living room cleaning, and she heard some one knocking on the door. Xantara opened the door, it was a young man. “I am looking for a job, as a gardener, or a handyman.” The young man said. “I am looking for jobs to feed myself and be able to pay my furnished room Ma’m.”

“Actually, I do need someone to take care of my garden and need some repairs done.” Xantara said. “But I cannot pay you much since I am new here and just started working.”

“I will accept anything you can afford to pay me “The young man said.

“Well, there is a small shack in the back.” Xantara said. “You can fix it, and live there rent free. That will be part of your salary.”

“That will be fine Ma’m.” The young man said. “I will be here early in the morning.”

“I will need to know your name young Mr.” Xantara said.

“My name is Sinbad.” The young man replied. “Bye”

The following morning Sinbad arrived early, Xantara showed him where the

shack was. Sinbad fixed the shack. Xantara bought some furniture for the shack.

“Sinbad, will you go to the hardware store and get me some materials I need for the bathroom?” Xantara asked. “I left the list on the kitchen counter for you to read and see if there is anything else that is need.”

Sinbad looked at Xantara and said with a shy voice. “Ma’m, I can’t read. My momma never let me go to school. My papa left her when I was a little boy and she never let me go nowhere. Momma got sick, died and I had to care for myself.”

Xantara sent Sinbad to school, where he learned to read and write. He became an architect and found employment in a big Corporation. Xantara and Sinbad fell in love, got married, and they had six beautiful children, three boys and three girls.

Everything was going good until one day; a woman appeared with a man, and a Police Officer. Xantara thought that something bad had happened to one of her children in school. To her surprise, the woman informed Xantara, that her father had died and, that she was the real owner of the house.

“It can’t be!” Xantara said. When I inquired at the Town all, I was told that the owner of the house died and had no heirs. I paid for the back taxes and they gave me the deed to the house.”

“My father forgot that he had a daughter, I did not know that he had died until recently.” The woman said. “The man with me is my lawyer; he can give you more details. I want my house empty by tomorrow morning.”

“I am not leaving this house.” Xantara said. “I am going to Town Hall to investigate all about this.”

“Madam, you have to leave today.” The woman said. “I have legal papers that say, that this is my house and if you do not leave, the Officer will force you to leave.”

“But I can’t leave now!” Xantara exclaimed. “I have nowhere to go and my children will be on the street. Give me a chance to find out, there has to be a mistake

somewhere. Give me time to get a place for my kids.”

The Police Officer approached Xantara and said. “Madam you have to leave now or I will force you to leave. I am sorry.”

Xantara took her clothes and her children’s clothes, she took whatever she could put it in the car, went to Town Hall, and was informed that all was true according to the woman’s legal papers.

Xantara then went to school to pick her children up. When she called Sinbad, he said he was not going with her. ”I do not want to live with you any more. I am going to live in the house with the woman who owns what used to be our house. I don’t love you any more.”

Xantara could not believe what was happening to her. That night Xantara and her children slept in a hotel. When the children asked about their dad, Xantara told them he was on a long vacation, and she also told them they had to move because the house had bugs.

Xantara found an apartment and when she went to get money for the rent and deposit, she found that her bank account was empty and her credit cards had been transferred in her husbands name only. The hotel manager felt sorry for her and let her stay at the hotel until she got paid. Xantara took her children to school then left them in

the lobby at her office until she got out of work.

Xantara then found another apartment and moved in with her children. One morning her boss informed Xantara, that people were complaining about her leaving her children in the lobby and told her she was suspended from work until she found a

solution.

Xantara could not find a baby sitter for six young kids, and had no money. Finally Xantara had to sell her car to be able to feed her children. Xantara began to do odd jobs like cleaning, taking care of old people, walking dogs, delivered newspapers to earn money. This was the only way that she was able earn money while her kids went to school.

Xantara taught her children to be good and had always found a way to give them what they needed. She left her career and all for her children. One by one Xantara’s children graduated from college and they either got married or left to live on their own.

What happens to Xantara next? Stay tuned for Chapter 3 coming soon!